


The one where Eddie's a smart twink and Richie's a horny idiot

by Lemon_head



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Bottom Eddie Kaspbrak, Eddie blushes like a little anime girl, Eddie is such a Twink it hurts, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, HELLA SEXUAL JOKES AND INUENDOS, Homophobia, I swear I'll write the smut this time, M/M, Richie Tozier is a Little Shit, Richie Tozier is a Mess, Swearing, Top Richie Tozier, eddie just hates richie, kinda????, lots of swearing, no beta. we die like men., she's kinda abusive..., sonia is a bitch, they aren't really "enemies"
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-04-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:41:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22119565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lemon_head/pseuds/Lemon_head
Summary: Very bad summary: Richie does terrible in school so his teachers decide to get him a tutor. Eddie volunteered to be a tutor out of the overwhelming need to help kids get their grades up but he definitely wasn’t expecting to have Richie.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 16
Kudos: 120





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> since my summary is so bad I thought this would help clear some shit up so basically Richie doesn’t do his homework and likes to flunk every test and the school wants to get him a tutor. Eddie didn’t sign up to have to deal with Richies loud ass but oh well. To get more into some specifics, Richie likes Eddie, he wants to kill Richie, but then he wants to Supreme smash. That pretty much sums it up.

Richie was usually a good kid when it came to schoolwork. He would get most of his work done in class, do his homework most of the time, and he did fairly well on his tests. That changed the second he got to 11th grade. All he wanted to do was talk during class. He threw his homework out the second the bell rang. 

Eddie was the complete opposite. He paid attention during class, did his homework on time, and had straight A’s. At their school they had this tutoring program, where kids who had good grades could help the slower or, in Richie’s case, more defiant kids. Eddie was the only one who still didn’t have someone to tutor.

Richie and Eddie weren’t friends by any means but they were somewhat acquainted. Since Derry was such a small town, everyone knew each other. A lot of Eddie’s friends were also Richie’s friends. Eddie never really grew fond of the other boy. He didn’t hate him, since they barely knew each other, but he pissed Eddie off.

So conveniently, the school assigned Richie their only available tutor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes my guy


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THEY MEET EACH OTHER! yeah shit gets pretty cute but Eddie still hates him

“Hello, Mr. Tozier. Glad to see you made it to school on time today,” Principal Hartley said, sarcastically.

“Well, Larry, now that you’ve got my parents involved in this clusterfuck of a report card I had to turn my alarm clock back on,” Richie said, groggily, while crossing his arms.

“What have I told you about first names?” Mr. Hartley asked.

“We have this conversation every time I'm here. Just give it up man.”

“Alright let’s get to what’s really important here. I’ve talked to your parents and we’re going to be giving you a tutor to help you after school. I’m assuming you pay as much attention to them as you do to your teachers, so this is probably new information to you,” Mr. Hartley said, dryly.

“They couldn’t pay that kid enough,” Richie smirked.

“That’s the first thing I thought but I guess the kid said yes,” the man laughed, ”I was hoping that you two could meet today and talk a little beforehand. I expect you to be as kind as possible. He’s kind of a small kid and I don’t want you scaring him off.”

“Who is he?” Richie asked.

“Eddie Kaspbrak. I’ve seen him and your friend Bill hanging out on occasion. I’m assuming you two have seen each other in the halls at some point.”

“Yeah I know Eddie,” Richie said, smirking.

“Don’t get any ideas, Tozier. He’s a sweet kid and he shouldn’t be corrupted by you. He makes every class, aces every test, and my god if you screw this up you’re risking the final straw. Expulsion.”

“I don’t think you know Eds as well as me, Larry. He’s got good grades but he’s a feisty little thing.”

“Well he’ll be up here in a few minutes so don’t make this difficult,” Mr. Hartley warned.

After a couple more minutes of banter between the two, there was a small knock on the door.

“Come in!” Principal Hartley shouted, “Have a seat right there, Eddie.”

“Aw come on! How come he gets a first name and all I get is ‘Tozier’?” Richie asked, defensively.

“Because you make my life more difficult than necessary,” the man sighed, closing his eyes.

“Hiya Eds!” Richie said, enthusiastically.

“It’s just ‘Eddie’. Don’t call me ‘Eds’,” the other boy grumbled.

“See? Told you he was feisty,” Richie said, “I find the shorter someone is the shorter their temper.”

Eddie was already red with anger.

“Don’t push it, Tozier. You’re on thin ice. Eddie happens to be our only tutor left, so if I hear any complaints, you’re through,” Principal Hartley said, “Now you two get to class. Tozier, if I catch you in the halls, roaming around, one more time, you’re getting another call home.”

Richie nodded and got up. Both of them started walking to their classes .

“So are you coming to my place tonight?” Richie asked.

“Yeah.”

“Do you need a ride?” 

“I can walk,” Eddie answered, while looking at the ground.

“You could get run over,” Richie smirked, “Why don’t you have a car anyway? You’re 17 right?” 

“My mom doesn’t trust that I can drive properly,” Eddie said.

“So she lets you risk getting hit by a car? Just let me drive you. It’d be easier. Please?” Richie pleaded, drawing out the ‘eeeee’ in please.

“If it’ll make you shut up,” Eddie groaned.

“Cool. meet me out by the bike racks after school,” Richie said, excitedly, before he disappeared into a different classroom.

\--------------------------------------------------

“You’re actually waiting for me at the bike racks? So this means you really do love me!” Richie yelled from across the grassy field outside the school.

“Jesus christ! Did you have to yell that in front of everyone?” Eddie said, turning red.

“Not ‘Jesus’. Just ‘Richie’,” The lankey boy laughed.

Eddie rolled his eyes. Then Richie led him to his shitty car.

“Have you ever cleaned this thing?” Eddie gagged, as he sat in the car.

“Not that I recall.”

“I should have just walked. Sure, I could get hit by a car, but at least I won’t get fucking hepatitis!” Eddie said, sounding about ready to vomit, “Is that- Oh my god! Do you seriously have a used condom sitting on the dashboard?!”

“Safe sex, baby,” Richie winked, as he started the piece of shit car, “It’s not actually ‘used’ it’s just ‘out’. I was blowing them up last week while I skipped 5th period.”

“This is so concerning. Like, I’m genuinely scared for your wellbeing,” Eddie looked at him, horrified.

“Whatever. You wanna stop for food?” Richie asked.

“I don’t want to think about food while sitting in this junkyard. And I’m supposed to be busy teaching you math, not getting wined and dined,” Eddie said.

“When you put it that way it sounds like we were going on a date. Didn’t know you thought of it like that Eds,” Richie smirked.

“Fuck off.”

“Gladly. We’ll be at my house in like, 2 minutes so wait til we get there to throw up. If you do it in here I’ll actually have to clean it.”

Once they pulled into Richie’s driveway, Eddie jumped out of the car to get some real air.

“Welcome to my place of residence. You can do pretty much whatever you want, my parents won’t care and honestly might love you even more than me. You could burn the house down and they’d still be like, ‘well it’s fine because he has straight A’s’.”

“Well I might have to burn your room if it’s as bad as that car,” Eddie said.

“Already thinking of the bedroom? I like it. I’ll go get the matches,” Richie joked.

“Oh god.”

When they walked in Eddie was pleasantly surprised by how clean the place was.

“Oh you must be the tutor, Eddie!” a woman who popped out of a doorway, said, “I’m Maggie, Richie’s mom.”

“Hello,” Eddie smiled and shook her hand.

She decided to pull him into a hug instead.

“God mom, you’re gonna get arrested if you keep touching him like that,” Richie laughed.

“Shut up Richie,” his mom said, “If it weren’t for this boy you’d be kicked out of school.”

“C’mon Eddie,” Richie motioned for him to come upstairs.

“I’ll make some snacks for you two!” Richie’s mom yelled, after them.

He was surprised to find out that Richie’s room wasn’t as bad as his car. He had some garbage piling up on his desk and some clothes scattered around on the floor. There was also a T.V. and some suggestive magazines in the corner. And the corner across from that, there was a twin bed with a nice set of Star Wars sheets on it and one big, fluffy black blanket.

Richie flopped on his bed and threw his backpack (which was fairly empty) on the floor, across the room. The other boy stood there awkwardly in the doorway watching as Richie layed, lazily, on his bed.

“So where am I supposed to sit?” Eddie asked, awkwardly.

“Well that chair by the desk is broken so I guess… right here?” Richie asked, pointing at his lap.

“What the fuck, dude?” Eddie asked, immediately turning red.

“Damn, that got you hot and bothered didn’t it. Just sit next to me.”

What Richie didn’t tell him was, his bed was slightly broken so there’s a certain spot that he liked to make people sit that would catapult them into his lap. Sure his bed was unbearable to sleep on but he wasn’t willing to give up this added feature.

Eddie slowly walked over and sat on Richie’s bed next to him. He ended up getting flopped over on top of Richie.

“Woah there, Eds! You’re moving a little fast, and that’s coming from me!” Richie laughed.

“Jesus christ,” Eddie grumbled, as he tried to compose himself.

Once he got back upright he was still pressed up against Richie’s side.

“Do we really have to sit like this? It’s a little uncomfortable,” Eddie said, wiggling away from the other boy.

“My hypothesis is, if we sit really close I’ll learn better,” Richie smirked. 

“Well it’s distracting.”

“Sure it might be distracting you but I am very focused right now. I’m the one who’s supposed to be learning here, not you,” Richie said, crossing his arms.

“Whatever,” Eddie groaned, “should we start with Math?” 

“Sure.”

Eddie spent the next 15 minutes trying to explain what a linear function is while Richie continued his playful, inattentive behavior. He made a few jokes that made Eddie blush even harder than when he was sitting Richie’s lap. He couldn’t help but find it adorable, how flustered Eddie got. In the middle of it Richie’s mom, Maggie Tozier, brought in an assortment of vegetables and hummus for the two boys.

“How the fuck are you eating that? It’s not even real food,” Richie said, as he looked over at Eddie shoving multiple carrots in his mouth at once.

“It’s good for you,” Eddie said, though it was muffled from all the food in his mouth, “Tastes good too.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Eat one then,” Eddie smirked, “Get some broccoli in there too, and eat the whole thing, not just the fluffy part.”

“I’m only doing this ‘cause you’re cute,” Richie stated, before shoving a carrot in his mouth. 

Eddie was in a constant state of blushing at that point. 

“Give me that green tree thing,” Richie gasped for air as he made grabby hands at the broccoli.

“You’re such a drama queen!” Eddie laughed. 

When Richie was done and decided that broccoli wasn’t terrible, he got up to get something to drink. In the meantime, Eddie examined his room further. He had a lot of, what most would call, nerd paraphernalia. Action figures, posters, comic books. 

Before Richie got in the room, Eddie scooted away from the spot that would inevitably throw him into the other boy. Richie came in the room holding an array of beverages.

“We’ve got pretty much anything you could think of so pick one,” Richie said, holding all together about 10 cans and bottles in his arms, “Pick quickly, they’re fucking cold.”

Eddie snagged a can of Sprite from the pile, then Richie threw the rest on the bed to sort through them. Then he closed his eyes and randomly picked one.

“Yes! This is the one I wanted,” He said, excitedly when he pulled out a Coke.

“If you wanted it, then why did you pick at random?” Eddie asked.

“So if I got one that I didn’t want I would have something to complain about.”

He then cleared all the drinks off and put them on his desk. While he was walking back to his bed, he noticed something. Eddie had moved over to the end of the bed, where he wouldn’t be up against Richie.

“I see how it is, Eds. You don’t want to sit near me cause you want me to fail math. Wow,” Richie said, sarcastically, putting his hand over his heart.

“I’m supposed to be helping you with math not cuddling.”

“Fine.”

Their new position was Richie at the head of the bed and Eddie at the end. 

“So do you have any specific math questions that I could help you with?” Eddie asked, while flipping through his math book.

“You won’t make fun of me right?” Richie asked, pushing up his glasses.

“No,” Eddie replied, surprised at how nervous the other boy sounded, “It’s probably a really common question.”

“Okay. How the fuck do you do long division?” Richie looked genuinely worried.

Eddie busted up laughing immediately.

“You said you wouldn’t make fun of me!”

“I’m not it’s just-” Eddie had to pause to laugh a little more, “Long division is so stupid, so I understand why you’re having trouble with it. Even I still get tripped up on it. Don’t tell anybody but almost all the straight A students cheat and use a calculator.”

“Wait! You don’t even get in trouble for it? This is an injustice!” Richie yelled.

“The teacher doesn’t care. I do my homework and do well on tests, in return he pretends he doesn’t see my calculator,” Eddie explained.

“Woah. That’s so unfair.”

“If you let me teach you math, you could do the same thing,” Eddie said, smirking.

“Damn Eds. Didn’t know you were such a bad boy,” Richie replied.

“Did you think I was a saint?” Eddie said, looking shocked.

“Well you give off a vibe of, ‘I’m a virgin, who’s never had a drink of alcohol in my life, and my mom doesn’t let me go outside, cause she thinks I’ll get cancer if I breathe air that hasn’t been properly filtered.’” Richie mocked.

“Well… you’re not entirely off?” Eddie said.

“I must be great at reading people.”

“Well my mom’s not that bad anymore, since I’m almost an adult she’s pretty much accepted that I need fresh air to live. I’ve gotten drunk once but I kinda threw up all over my friend Bill’s car.”

“Okay what about the virgin thing though?” Richie smirked.

Eddie slapped his shoulder, hard, before laughing a little.

“Well that’s none of your business,” Eddie said.

“Oh my God! You are?” Richie gasped, “I can’t say I’m surprised.”

“Is it really a bad thing though? I’ve never been in a relationship so I don’t have any STD’s, I’m not stuck on my ex, and I actually have somewhat of a productive life. I don’t know why people make such a big deal out of being a virgin,” Eddie said, defensively.

“Oh you know exactly why people make a big deal about it,” Richie smirked.

“No, I don’t. Enlighten me,” Eddie crossed his arms.

“There’s a lot that goes into it. There’re the people who think it terrible and won’t have sex with you because of it and then there’re people who think it’s hot and only wanna fuck you because of it. Then there are the small minority of people that don’t give a shit. Why someone wouldn’t wanna fuck you is cause they think you’re gonna get attached. Why someone would want to is cause they think it’s hot that they’re the only one who’s ever done that to you and it makes them feel special and shit. And then it gets into the whole possessive ‘you’re mine and nobody else’s!” thing, which is so fucking stupid. And why someone wouldn’t give a shit is because, well it’s quite obvious. They don’t care,” Richie explained.

“Which one are you?” Eddie asked, quietly.

“Well I see it as more of a pros and cons sorta thing. Pros being, they don’t have STD’s, they won’t have as many set expectations, you get to have sex, they will always remember you. The cons are, they probably don’t know what they’re doing, it might hurt them and that’s pretty much it. So in my opinion… It doesn’t matter, as long as I’m having sex, I’m down,” Richie answered.

“You’re a fucking pig.”

“And you’re a prude!” Richie laughed, “why haven’t you done it anyway? Cause you seem smart and from what I’ve heard, chicks dig that.”

“Well that’s not really a question you’d ask someone on the first day of knowing them,” Eddie responded, immediately blushing.

“I won’t make fun of you for whatever it is. Like, if girls don’t like you, if you’re scared, or if you’re gay, I don’t really care,” Richie was trying his best at being nice and accepting and Eddie wasn’t buying it.

“Do you swear you won’t tell anyone? Not a single soul?” Eddie asked, sternly.

Richie nodded and turned more so he was facing the other boy.

“Oh God, I don’t know why I’m telling you this,” Eddie sighed, and ran his hand through his hair.

“Just do it. I won’t tell anyone.”

“Fine. I don’t really- how should I say this? I’m not too into the uh- females. And we live in such a small town that I can’t really be like that. Everyone tells everybody everything here and if I even tried to ask a boy for anything, let alone tell anyone this, I don’t know what would happen,” Eddie sounded like he was about to cry, “I don’t even know why I bothered telling you but you just seemed like you wouldn’t care that much about it. Please don’t tell anyone.”

Richie sat there for a second, shocked at how emotional Eddie got. He was surprised he even told him. It seemed like he’d been holding in that secret for too long. Richie almost wanted to hug him, he felt so bad.

“So, you’re gay?” Richie asked.

“To put it in simple terms, yes, but I don’t want to just be known as ‘the gay kid’. There’s a lot more to me than just the fact that I like men. What about you?”

“Well I’m what most would call, ‘willing to experiment’. I’m straight but sometimes I have… exceptions. Basically that means hypothetically I’d fuck a dude if he’s hot or has somewhat feminine features,” Richie tried to explain.

Eddie stared at him for a couple seconds.

“So you really don’t have a problem with it?” Eddie asked.

“To be honest, I thought you were gay the second you walked into Larry’s office,” he responded, “Have you seriously never told anyone?”

Eddie shook his head before suggesting that they get back to work.

\------------------------------------------------------

At around 6:00 Richie offered to drive Eddie home, considering how dark it was outside.

“Just let me drive you!”

“I can walk on my own! Your car is disgusting!” Eddie yelled back.

They were standing in the driveway next to Richie’s car.

“If you walk you could get his by a car, kidnapped, tortured, or get swept away by the wind! There are endless possibilities with that scenario, but if you just got in my car and let me drive you, nothing bad will happen!”

“No. Your car is so gross I’ll catch some flesh eating bacteria just by breathing in it.” Eddie responded.

“That’s it!” Richie yelled.

He proceeded to open up the passenger door and start running towards Eddie.

“What are you-? No! Richie NO!” Eddie yelled, when he realized what the other boy was doing.

He ran over, grabbed Eddie, picked him up, and shoved him in the car. The entire neighborhood could hear Eddie screaming and Richie grunting, as he tried to shove the short boy into the car.

“It’s for your own good, Eds,” Richie said through gritted teeth.

“You’re such an asshole, Richie!”

“Just sit in the fucking seat and let me drive you home!”

“Fine!” Eddie yelled.

“Thank you,” Richie sighed.

Eddie was trying to give directions to Richie as they drove but then Richie cut him off.

“Did you notice how easily I picked you up? What if that was some random dude grabbing you as you walked home, because you didn’t want a ride?”

“If you clean your car, maybe I won’t fight you as much on it. Turn left at the next light. Why do you even care about this so much?” Eddie asked.

“I don’t know. Because you’re smaller than me. It’d that alpha male energy that just takes over and it’s like ‘that’s small. Must protect.’ You know what I’m saying?”

“Well I guess I get it but it’s still a little weird. It’s that next house with that tan car in front,” Eddie pointed.

“Alright. See you at school tomorrow,” Richie said, as Eddie got out of the car.

“Sadly. You better clean your car,” Eddie sighed.

“Bye Eds,” Richie waved as he drove off.

“That’s not my name!” Eddie yelled after him.

Once he got into his house he went to the living room to check if his mom was still awake. She was laying back in her recliner with some game show playing on the TV.

“Hey Eddie Bear,” she said as he walked in the room.

“Hi mommy.”

“I’m getting a little sick of falling asleep in the chair, honey. Would you help me down to my room?” She asked.

Eddie knew this game all too well. He’d try to help her down the hall but she’d always end up falling and blaming him for it. Some sick game. Last time it happened, they had to go to the hospital and make sure she didn’t break any bones.

The worst part is she can walk just fine. Eddie has seen her. He knows that she can walk to the kitchen and bathroom and doesn’t really need any help. But the second he gets home she’s ‘too weak’.

“You really need to be careful. I don’t want you going to the hospital again,” Eddie said, worriedly. 

“If you do it right, we won’t need to worry about it,” his mom said, passive aggressively.

She used to be able to walk around and stuff but then one day she decided to stop. Eddie put the bottom part of the chair down and waited for his mom to ‘catch her breath’. She stood weakly on her knees before flopping over onto Eddie. Once they made their way to the hallway, the boy had to stop for a second. His mom was leaning on his back with her arms around his shoulders.

“Give me a minute,” Eddie wheezed, digging around in his pocket for his inhaler.

“Eddie bear, I don’t know if I’m gonna make it!” Sonia cried. 

(A/N: sorry to interrupt but eddie’s mom’s name is sonia and I think it’s the funniest thing ever)

Eddie bit his tongue and kept on moving after having a few puffs of battery acid. He still had the inhaler hanging out of his mouth as he dragged his mom down the hallway. They finally got to her room. Eddie got her over to the side of the bed and she flopped on it. She straightened herself out and then asked Eddie to put a blanket on her.

“What if we just put the TV here, Mommy?” Eddie asked, pointing at the corner of the room, “Then you won’t have to get up and go to the living room and you can just stay here.”

“But the living room is closer to the kitchen, sweetheart.”

“Well then why don’t we just move your bed into the living room?”

“I’ll think about it tomorrow. I need to sleep. I love you,” Sonia yawned.

“Love you too, mommy,” Eddie said, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

He tried not to cringe every time he called her mommy. But if he called her anything else she’d freak out.

Eddie ran down the hall to grab his backpack and then to his room. He stayed up until 9ish doing chemistry homework before he decided he couldn’t take it. He threw all of his papers into his backpack and off his bed, then turned off his light. He laid down and closed his eyes. After about 30 minutes of tossing and turning he heard the phone ring. He got up and checked, confused about why someone would call him at 9:30. He stumbled off to the kitchen to answer it.

“Hello?” He said, obviously angry at whoever was waking him up.

“What’s up, Eddie Spaghetti?” Richie said.

“Not my name. Why are you calling me at 9:30? I was trying to sleep. And how did you get my number?” Eddie grumbled.

“Wow. you really are a virgin. Well I found your number from your friend, Bill. And I’m calling to say you left your pencil at my house.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? You called me at 9:30 while I was almost asleep to tell me I left a pencil at your house? Keep it! I have like 10 packs in front of me right now!” Eddie whisper/yelled, trying not to wake his mom.

“Yeah but it’s your pencil I figured you should know about it,” Richie said.

Eddie could practically hear him smirking. 

“Well thanks for telling me, I’m going to bed now,” Eddie was about to put the phone on the hook before he heard Richie yelling.

“Wait! I figured now that we’re here you know so I had a question for you…,” Richie said.

“Go on.”

“So I was cleaning my car and I found some things I wanted to keep so I wanted to know, can you reuse condoms?” he asked, smirking.

“Bye Richie,” Eddie said, hanging up.

He headed back to his room, smiling. Richie shouldn't have made him that happy but for some reason he couldn’t stop smiling.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if I remember correctly Eddie jerks off at the end of this one but it's not very descriptive cause I was writing it in class and didn't want anyone to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright so I'm writing this in a google doc and I have my friend in it and she likes to read it and shit, the only problem being I can't write while she's looking at it, so sorry if you see little notes of me telling her to get out....just tell me or something cause I don't red my work EVER. it's against my religion.

Derry highschool was fucked. And here’s why. School starts at 7:30 in the morning. So the majority of people get there at 7:00 except for people like Richie who get there at 8:00. Eddie got up at 5:00 most days so he’d have time to get ready. Richie rolls out of bed and goes to school half asleep. 

That day was somewhat normal. Eddie woke up at 5:00 and showered, then watched TV. His mom didn’t wake up until after he went to school, most days. At around 6:40 Eddie usually starts walking to school but he was interrupted by the phone ringing.

“Hello?” He said, as he picked up the phone.

“I knew you were already awake you sexless nerd!”

“Damn it Richie! I’ve gotta leave now if I want to make it to school on time,” Eddie whined.

“Do you seriously walk to school? You’re gonna get hit by a car. I’m gonna come pick you up. No getting out of it,” Richie said.

“What if I take a shortcut and you can’t find me?”

“Then I guess I’ll have to tell your mom that you took some scary back road full of hooligans and lepers.”

“Fine. If I’m late because of you, you’re dead,” Eddie warned, before hanging up.

He waited around in his driveway for 5 minutes before Richie pulled up.

“I cleaned it!” He yelled out the window.

“I see that,” Eddie responded, as he got in.

“I even vacuumed and febreezed the shit out of it.”

“Good job,” Eddie laughed.

“So now you have no excuse for not wanting me to drive you.”

“Why’d you call me this morning anyway?” 

“To see if you were actually gonna walk to school. I usually don’t wake up until later but for you I woke up at six,” Richie smirked.

They rolled up to school and Richie parked in his normal spot.

“We still have like 30 minutes until school starts.”

“Can you even play music in this thing?” Eddie asked, looking at the very dated radio.

“Hold on,” Richie said, as he reached back and grabbed a box full of tapes, “Pick one.”

“Ummmmm- Echo and the Bunnymen?” Eddie asked, pointing at the first tape that caught his eye, “Hold on. You have like 6 Madonna tapes here.”

“So which is it gonna be?”

“Like a Prayer,” Eddie mumbled.

Immediately after putting it in they both started singing as loud as possible.

“Wait a minute! ‘Down on my knees. I wanna take you there.’ This is a blow job song!” Richie yelled over the loud music.

Eddie looked like his whole world had shifted.

“Dude. that’s- wow. I never thought about it,” Eddie said, looking shocked.

After a couple songs they both went to their classes. In the middle of 2nd period, Eddie caught a glimpse of Richie in the window of the classroom door. When the door opened, Eddie tried his hardest not to make eye contact.

“Tozier? What are you doing here?” The chemistry teacher, Mr. Weir, asked.

“I’m here to give something to my dear friend, Eddie Spaghetti.”

“Eddie Kaspbrak, would you please come up here?”

“Fuck. Couldn’t you wait ‘til after school to do this?” Eddie mumbled to Richie.

“Eddie I know you’re a good kid. Richie- I’m just a little confused as to why you two know each other,” The teacher sighed.

“I’m his tutor,” Eddie grumbled.

“He left his pencil at my house last night, I’m here to return it. Nothing bad,” Richie said, smiling.

“Wait until lunch next time, Tozier. Give him the pencil and don’t come back ‘til 4th period when you’re supposed to be here,” Mr. Weir rubbed his eyes as he spoke.

Richie handed the other boy the pencil. He made sure to bump hands with Eddie for just long enough before it became weird and then walked backwards out of the class.

“Sorry about that, sir.” Eddie said to the teacher.

“Sorry you have to tutor him,” He laughed.

\-------------------------------------------------------------

Eddie convinced his friend, Bill, to hide in the library with him during lunch.

“Why are we in h-here dude?” Bill asked.

“You know that kid Richie?”

“Yeah we’re friends.”

“Well he won’t stop popping up and embarrassing me. I know he’s gonna look for me in the cafeteria so might as well hide in the one place he’ll never go,” Eddie sighed.

“Well Stan’s in there. You think I could sneak in and g-grab him?” Bill asked.

“Do not let Richie see you. He knows we’re friends.”

Bill nodded than ran off to go find Stan. Eddie browsed the tiny comic book section they had in the library. After he’d concluded there were no new books he sat down at a little table and tried finishing his chemistry homework. After a few minutes he looked up to see if Bill was back.

“Oh no,” Eddie sighed.

Bill walked in with Stan and Trashmouth Tozier, himself.

“S-sorry Eddie. I really tried to go fast,” Bill whispered.

“Why are you here, Richie?” Eddie crossed his arms.

“I’m here to check out some of those books on human anatomy,” Richie smirked.

“The ‘human body/health’ section is down there, fuckwad,” Eddie pointed at the shelf across the room.

“If they show the body parts, I’ll make sure to yell for you,” Richie said, as he walked off.

“Thanks,” Eddie responded, sarcastically.

The next 20 minutes were basically just Eddie and stan doing homework, Bill drawing, and Richie getting yelled at by the librarian for writing little side comments in the anatomy books. When the bell was about to ring, Richie stopped Eddie from leaving.

“You still coming over tonight?” Richie asked.

“Do I have a choice?”

“Okay. Meet me at my car after school. I never lock it so you can just get in.”

“Aren’t you afraid of it getting stolen?” Eddie asked.

Richie smiled and shrugged before he walked out the door.

\-------------------------------------------

Just as he said, his car was unlocked. Eddie sat in the passenger seat of Richie’s car and waited. After a few minutes of waiting, he put his head down on the window and closed his eyes. The one thing that sucked about working hard in school as constantly being tired. He wasn’t asleep but he definitely looked like it. He humped a little when he heard Richie get in the car.

“Were you asleep?” Richie asked.

“No. I was resting my eyes.”

Richie started up the car and pulled out of the parking spot.

“Well if that’s what you look like when you’re sleeping, you’re the cutest sleeper ever.”

(A/N: broski that’s a little...sugar gay…………)

Eddie was, very obviously, blushing. Like hard.

“Uh. T-thank you?”

“You’re stuttering like Bill now.” Richie giggled.

(A/N: HE DIDN’T EVEN SAY “NO HOMO”. SHOOK.)

They stayed relatively silent for the whole ride. When they pulled into Richie’s driveway, his mom, Maggie, was just about to leave.

“Hey boys, I’m heading to the store then I’m gonna go to my book club. I’ll probably be back at 7 or 8,” she said, as she was walking to her car.

“Alright bye mom. Love you,” Richie said, while he got out of the car.

She tried to hug him which resulted in him slithering away from her and whispering something to her that Eddie couldn’t hear.

“Jesus Richie! Eddie’s a nice boy, he probably hugs his mom before she leaves too!”

“Have fun at book club. Come on Eddie,” Richie said, grabbing his sleeve and pulling him up the walkway to his house.

“You should’ve hugged your mom, man.”

“I don’t wanna look like a loser virgin, like you,” Richie groaned.

He led Eddie to the kitchen to try and look for something to eat. Richie grabbed a box of nutty bars and a bag of doritos, while Eddie found a bag of baby carrots.

“Are you fucking serious?” Richie asked, looking at the sad, wet bag of carrots

“What? You better share those doritos with me.”

They walked to Richie’s room and started eating. Eddie finished the entire bag of carrots and put a sizable dent in the doritos. 

“Gimme you math book,” Eddie said, with his mouth full.

Richie smiled and handed it to him.

“What are you smiling at, fuckface?” Eddie asked, as he was about to put another chip in his mouth.

“Nothin’, just do the math thing,” Richie was still smiling and staring at the other boy.

“Quadratic equations! Do you know how to do those?” 

“I don’t know how to do any of it. That’s why I have an F in math.”

Eddie nodded and got out some paper. They worked on math for an hour and to Richie’s surprise, he actually understood most of it. He wasn’t great at it but he did fairly well.

“So you understand it now?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah kinda.”

“That’s awesome!” Eddie exclaimed.

“You wanna play a game or something? Cause I’m ready for a break,” Richie sighed.

“What kinda game?”

“I’ve got a great idea. It’s a guessing game.”

Richie explained the game and essentially one player gets blindfolded and has to guess stuff. Like what song’s playing, what food they’re eating, what movie is on just by listening to it, which show it is based off how you hum the theme song. Eddie agreed to play it.

“Alright you’re getting blindfolded first cause I’ve got a lot for you to guess,” Richie said, running for his dad’s room to get a tie.

“Don’t make me guess anything gross!” Eddie yelled after him.

“What do you consider ‘gross’?” Richie smirked, as he covered the other boys eyes.

Eddie flipped him off and then waited for Richie to make him guess something.

“Alright your first challenge. Guess the song.”

Richie pulled his record player out from under his desk and then went to his closet to pick out a couple albums.

“Alright I’m gonna start this one at a random song so I hope you like this band,” Richie said as he put the needle down on the song.

“Oh my god! It’s ‘Disintegration’ by The Cure!” Eddie screamed, after Richie put the needle down.

“Holy shit! You actually like The Cure?” Richie yelled back at him.

“Are you kidding? Of course I do!” 

“I know this is a little early into us knowing each other but, will you marry me?” 

Eddie laughed and told him to start the next song. Richie switched to a different album and started playing a random song.

“It’s ‘Run Like Hell’!” Eddie screamed.

“A boy after my heart,” Richie laughed.

Eddie’s face started getting super red but other than that it was super fun. After a couple more songs they moved on to movies. Richie led him to the living room where the TV was and sat him on the couch. He picked out a selection of VHS tapes that were some of his favorite movies. He popped in the first movie and then waited for Eddie.

“Wait they’re talking about a Madonna song,” Eddie mumbled, racking his brain to figure it out, “Reservoir Dogs!”

“Eddie I’m in love with you! I never thought a virgin like yourself would like the same shit as a sex hound like myself!” Richie laughed.

“Fuck off, Trashmouth,” Edde flipped him off.

He ended up guessing the rest correctly except for the porn tape that Richie started playing.

“Alright do you think you know what it is?” Richie smirked.

“Uh- wait! Is this a porno, you perv?” Eddie yelled.

“The exact name is ‘Naughty Nurses 3’ but yeah.”

Eddie ripped the blindfold off and ran to turn the TV off.

“Why’d you do that?” Richie laughed.

“What if your mom came home and found me blindfolded on the couch while you’re watching ‘Naughty Nurses 3’? You think she’d approve, fuckwad?” he said, crossing his arms.

“Woah there Eds. Are you,” Richie paused for a second, “blushing?”

“What! No I’m not! You’re just an idiot and it’s making me frustrated!” Eddie said, turning even redder.

“Alright let’s do food now,” Richie grabbed the tie and put it back over Eddie’s eyes.

They walked into the kitchen and Richie told the other boy to get on the counter.

“I can’t see anything. Where the fuck is the counter?”

“Here let me help,” Richie said, and then picked Eddie up and put him on the counter next to the fridge.

Eddie made a weird ‘gah’ noise when he was lifted off the ground. Richie opened the fridge and started whistling innocently and pulling out random objects.

“Alright here’s how this game’s gonna work. I’m gonna take a food over to you, you’re gonna smell it and if you can’t guess from the smell, I get to put it in your mouth,” Richie smirked.

“I’m pretty good at smelling things so whatever you’re plotting, isn’t gonna work.”

Richie grabbed a jar of mayonnaise and silently unscrewed the lid. He got out a spoon and took a big glob out.

“I can sell that from here, dumbass. It’s mayonnaise,” Eddie said.

Richie nodded, then proceed to eat the big glob off the spoon. 

“Did you just eat that?” Eddie yelled then gagged.

“Why yes I did. Do you have a problem with that?”

Richie got the next item out and held it up to Eddie’s nose.

“Lemon,” Eddie yelled.

“Correct.”

After a few more obvious foods, Richie pulled out the last one.

“I can’t smell anything,” Eddie said.

“Alright open up,” Richie smirked.

Eddie felt a cold, dick shaped, object slide into his mouth. Before it even got an inch into his mouth he chomped the tip off.

“It’s a cucumber, you whore!” Eddie yelled with his mouth muffled.

Richie busted up laughing and almost fell on the floor from laughing so hard. 

“I hope that’s not what it’s like to get head from you!” Richie wheezed, clutching his sides, ”You should’ve let me go deeper, man!”

“You’re a pervert.”

“You love it,” Richie said, then he pulled the tie off Eddie’s head.

They sat there for a minute staring at each other. Eddie’s face heated up when noticed how close Richie was standing to him.

“You know we should really get back to those quadratic equations,” Eddie said, quietly.

“You’re pretty cute when you’re flustered, you know?” Richie said.

“No homo though, right?” Eddie said, though his voice was still quiet.

Richie just smiled and walked back to his room leaving Eddie wide eyed and blushing. He jumped off the counter and walked to Richie’s room, to find him opening his math book.

“Can you play some music or something?” Eddie asked.

Richie nodded and turned his radio on. he flipped through stations for a while but settled on the one playing some Pearl Jam song.

(A/N: keep in mind this is set in 1993 so I’ll try and keep all the references from then or before. If I get one wrong, tell me.)

Eddie was working on his homework while Richie was trying to sneakily copy his answers.

“Can you wait for me to finish and then I’ll just hand you my paper?” Eddie said.

“How’d you know I was copying?” Richie asked.

“You’re not smooth.”

Richie agreed to take his paper when he was done. After he was done copying all the answers, he caught a glimpse of Eddie who had started reading his chemistry book, but had fallen asleep in it. He was curled up with the book under his head.

Richie sat and stared for a while. He thought getting straight A’s must of been exhausting if it made Eddie fall asleep that fast.

“Hey eds, it’s only 6:00 dude,” Richie said, shaking Eddie’s shoulder a little bit.

Eddie groaned and closed the book. He shoved it over near the edge of the bed and put his head back down.

“Do you want me to take you home yet?”

“No! I still need to get my homework done,” Eddie shot up.

“No, you should go home and go to sleep.”

“Richie here’s the key to getting good grades. Do everything at home. I do almost all of the work we’re gonna be doing in class the night before so I don’t have to try as hard. So if I get this all done tonight it’ll be smooth sailing for all of tomorrow,” He rubbed his eyes then grabbed the chemistry book.

“So you don’t do anything except schoolwork? That’s a sad life to be living.”

“Well I could try and get all of the weeks work done over the weekend but I’d rather not. I still watch TV and listen to music. It’s not all that bad. After college, when my mom’s not up my ass all the time, I can have a life.”

“Your mom seems like a mega bitch. Does she know that you’re um- playing for the same team?” Richie asked, awkwardly.

Eddie shook his head.

“She can’t know. I won’t tell her until I’m financially stable or something. At least then she can’t kick me out.”

“Do you think she would? I mean, pardon me for saying this but, she seems like a big slut. Why would someone kick their own kid out just cause they take it up the ass? It seems a little overkill,” Richie laughed.

“Real funny. I don’t know. Some people are just like that. And who said I take it up the ass?” Eddie asked, angrily.

“Nature. Everybody falls into one or two categories. Take it up the ass or not. You give me ‘take it up the ass’ kinda vibes.”

“How can someone be a virgin and also take it up the ass?” Eddie turned red.

“Well i’m not saying you do now but in the future when it does happen, you’re gonna be on the receiving end,” Richie smirked.

“You’re such an ass,” Eddie groaned.

“Aw! You love it.”

“Another question. Why have you thought so hard about what’s going in my ass? That seems a little weird.”

“To put it in simple terms, Eddie, I think about what goes in everyone’s ass,” Richie continued smirking.

Eddie’s face heated up some more, before he shook his head and tried to find his place in his textbook. He continued doing all the work he could for the next day. Richie started scribbling in his math book, mindlessly with a black pen.

“Oh my god! What are you doing?” Eddie yelled when he saw Richie’s math textbook.

“What?”

“You do know how much those cost, right? Oh my- you covered an entire question! The school’s gonna murder you!”

“Aww! You’re all worried about my well being? Cute,” Richie cooed.

“Shut up! The poor kid who has that book next year won’t be able to see the formula for the equation cause you covered it. You’re ruining people’s futures!”

Richie laughed and closed the book.

“It’s so cute when you get all angry.”

“S-stop saying shit like that,” Eddie crossed his arms.

“Why? Does it actually make you uncomfortable or do you just like it too much?” Richie teased.

“Well you calling me cute all the time is a little suspicious, don’t you think?”

“What do you mean?” Richie tried playing innocent.

“Are you kidding? Wouldn’t it be a little gay for me to call you cute?” Eddie asked.

“Well you are. So…,” Richie smirked.

“You’re really stressing me out.”

Richie told him to drop it and then let Edide get back to his homework. For the next 30 minutes they stayed relatively quiet. Occasionally Richie would get up and turn the radio up then he’d get up again and turn it down.

“Do you wanna go home yet?” Richie asked.

Eddie nodded and pushed all his stuff into his backpack. 

They got in the car and Richie turned on the radio.

“Was I being too much of a dick?” Richie asked.

“I mean, you always are, so no? I don’t know,” Eddie sighed.

“Can I make it up to you?”

“You’re scaring me.”

“There’s this party at Gretta Keene’s house next friday. Do you wanna come with me?” Richie asked, hesitantly.

“I don’t know. Gretta’s really fucking mean.”

“It’s a party. You don’t have to talk to her. We’ll just hang out in the back with Bill and have a couple drinks or something. I’m really just trying to pump some life into you, Eds.”

“Well I guess. I’ll tell my mom I’m staying at Bill’s house or something. You better not sneak off halfway through the night though. Also I’m not a big ‘drinking person’. What’s the point of the party anyways? Is it for a reason?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah. For dumb highschoolers to get drunk and ‘rub up’ on each other. I’ll try and keep the rubbing to a minimum for you. And you don’t have to drink that much…,” Richie smirked, “But it’d be a lot cooler if you did.”

“Well I’m not trying to be ‘cool’.”

“Suit yourself. Also it’s a costume party. So there’ll be slutty people. Though most of them are female, I’m sure you’ll find a guy who’s willing.”

“Highly doubt that,” Eddie laughed.

“Well I can’t speak for all straight guys but if someone is particularly feminine it doesn’t really matter. Like if you have more of a girly look to you, it’ll be a lot easier than you think. You’re already halfway there. I feel like most guys don’t talk about this. Or maybe I’m a little gayer than I originally thought.”

“I think I’ve learned too much about you. We’ve only known each other for two days and I think I know everything about you.”

“Nah it gets worse. I’m sure you’ll know everything by about,” Richie paused and thought for a second, “3:00pm next Wednesday.”

Eddie laughed a little then leaned his head against the window of the car.

“Do you ever sleep?” Richie sounded concerned.

“Yeah but not as much as I should. Fuck it. There’s no time for sleeping. I can sleep after college. Then I have nothing to lose. It’s not like they give you homework at a job.”

“Well you have the darkest circles I’ve ever seen under someone’s eyes. Go to sleep,” Richie said as he pulled up to Eddie’s house.

“I’ll think about it.”

Eddie got up and started walking to his door.

“Hey, eds?” Richie was smirking.

“What Richie?” he sighed.

Then he saw his backpack still sitting on the floor of Richie’s car.

“Fuck,” Eddie groaned.

After he grabbed it, he went inside and fell on the floor. He wasn’t hurt he was just so tired and confused. He realized he really did need sleep. He heard his mom snoring in her bedroom and almost cried from relief at the thought of not having to drag her down the hall.

He got up and hauled his backpack to his room and fell onto his bed. Eddie didn’t even take off his shoes he just closed his eyes. Richie crossed his mind slightly for a moment. A lot of what he said that afternoon came rushing back to Eddie. Though the more he thought of Richie, the more sleepy he got.

Then came the stupid tired thoughts. Like if Richie was good at cuddling. Of course then Eddie was trying to unthink it. But he ended up just rolling with it. And then he fell asleep.

\------------------------------------------------------

Richie got home and saw his mom parked in the driveway. He parked his car and then headed inside. His mom popped out of the kitchen.

“Were you driving Eddie home?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

“Damn. I wish I could’ve seen him again. He seems like a very nice boy,” she smiled.

“Yeah he is,” Richie sighed.

“Woah there Rich. If I’d have known any better I’d guess that you really like this kid,” she smirked.

“Jesus fucking christ, mom.”

“What? I’m not judging. I don’t care. All I’ve gotta say is he seems very sweet. So don’t corrupt him!” she pointed her finger in his face.

There was a pause for a minute before he lifted his head.

“But it’s so tempting!” Richie smirked.

“I knew it! Look, we haven’t had much of a talk yet cause from the way you talk, it seems like you know enough about girls. And I don’t want to make you uncomfortable right now but you’re gonna need to do some research or something before you try and pursue him. I’m of no use to you.”

“I don’t want to talk about it with you mom. No offense,” Richie sighed.

“Well if you or Eddie have any pressing questions, I’m your gal.”

“I don’t even think he likes me.”

“I have no idea what he’d see in you but it’s worked for enough people. Just do what you always do. If you be yourself, then you’ll know if he’s worth it.”

“Alright thanks. We’re never talking about this again. Love you,” Richie said and then walked off to his room.

He could hear his dad snoring on the couch outside his room. He knew if his dad found out he liked a guy, he’d probably just shrug it off. It wasn’t that he hated Richie, he just hated life. He’s gotten to the point of adulthood where everything is shitty and he doesn’t want to live. 

Richie was scared every day that he’d end up hating his life just like his dad. Sometimes he thought being homeless with no family would’ve made his dad happier. Sure, he’d be hungry and smell bad and he’d be cold but life wouldn’t be boring. 

Richie decided to stop thinking about his dad and shifting his focus to Eddie. He grabbed one of his pillows (oh no) and brought it to his chest. He ended up flopping on top of it and falling asleep. 

(A/N: I was no joke actually gonna make him hump the pillow but then I decided against it. You’re welcome.)

\------------------------------------------------

Eddie never had bad dreams or good dreams. He had confusing dreams. They just kinda sucked and then he wouldn’t remember them. He woke up at around three in the morning from the sound of his own voice. The next thing he noticed was his hand down his pants. And then he realized what the dream was about.

The gist of it was Eddie was still on the counter at Richie’s house but instead of Richie walking off to his room, he was between Eddie’s thighs.

Eddie bit his lip to try and stifle the sound that almost came out. Even the mere thought of Richie near him made him want to scream. He took his hand out of his pants and realized he hadn’t even finished in the dream. Slowly but surely the shame crept in.

“Fuck,” Eddie sighed, and then closed his eyes.

He was on the verge of tears from how embarrassing the whole situation was. Even if no one saw he’d have to live with the fact that he had a wet dream about Richie Tozier. Eddie couldn’t even bring himself to finish because every time he tried, all he could think of was Richie’s stupid smirk and his stupid jawline. 

Eddie whined at how pathetic he was being before he rolled over and tried to get back to sleep. He laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. After around 15 minutes of tossing and turning he decided it wasn’t the best idea to blue ball himself and try to go right to sleep.

Usually when he’d jerk off, it was to his one and only porn magazine. It was the same ‘Blue Boy’ one he’d always had hidden under his floorboards. And even then it was on a rare occasion. Thanks to school he had barely any alone time that wasn’t occupied by homework. But if it made him sleep and stop thinking about Richie, he’d probably let a car hit him.

He got up and walked across his room to the corner where he hid everything. There were pictures, his only report card with a C on it from 7th grade that he’d hid from his mom, and then the old wrinkled magazine. It was so old that the pages were falling out. The only reason he even had it was because he stole it from the dumpster behind the school. As gross as it sounded, he found a box of porn next to a dumpster behind the school when he was in 9th grade.

So he kept one and never got rid of it. As he made his way back to his bed, he couldn’t get his mind off of Richie in the dream. All Eddie could really remember was Richie’s head between his legs and Richie smirking. The fact that that was enough to wake him up made Eddie feel like an idiot.

Once he made it back to his bed, he sat down on the edge. His normal routine was super calculated. There was a set of steps and special rules he made for himself. But in that moment he considered breaking all of the rules and just going with what his dick was saying to him.

Which was, ‘Come on Eds. just think about Richie and jerk off like the filthy animal you are!’

Eddie sighed and then made the worst decision that night. He threw the magazine down on the floor and flopped back up on his bed. It only took him about 30 second before he was covering his mouth so his mom couldn’t hear him and spilling out into his blankets.

“Fuck,” Eddie whispered, realizing he’d have to wash his blankets.

At that moment he decided not to give a shit and rolled over and went back to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so I just read the ending to see if it was bad. I was right it was bad. don't mind me vomiting in the corner :D


	4. the 4th one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mmmmmm im too tired to make a summary so..... yeah. just have fun ig.  
> https://youtu.be/8KsT6RgXF_I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ight y'all. im back. ummmmm. sorry I kind of didn't upload shit for months. I've been really busy watching movies and tv shows that I've already seen 1,000,000,000,,0000,,,,,o000 times. ya know. the important stuff. but it you'd take the time to look at these youtube videos you will see ya bitch still got a sense of humor about it even though I feel bad for never uploading and making promises that always fall through :D
> 
> https://youtu.be/B3vNS3qMibU

Richie woke up at 5:30. That was super odd since he usually slept until he had to leave or until school was already in session. Not that day though. He spent all morning getting ready. He took a shower, fucked with his hair for 30 minutes, and then flopped on the floor after 15 minutes of looking for an outfit.

He had 5 different ones picked out but he didn’t know which to choose until he realized something He was only worried about what Eddie thought. So instead of focusing on the fact that he was a little gay for Eddie, Richie decided to call him.

“What, Richie?” Eddie grumbled when he picked up the phone.

“I need your gay guy opinion on something.”

“Jesus. What is it?”

“Okay so I have like 5 outfits picked out but I don’t know which one to wear. They all look good but some are better than others.”

“Alright so I may be gay but I’m not fashionable. Do you want me to tell you what I think is hot and then you can just go off of that?” Eddie asked, but then realized that was a horrible plan.

“Yeah sure.”

“Don’t wear anything formal. Like just cool clothes. Long sleeve shirts under t-shirts. Baggy jeans. And shoes honestly don’t matter.”

“That’s basically what I already wear. 3 of the outfits I chose are that. Is it seriously that easy?”

“Not just me but girls love it too. No one knows why.”

“Wow. Well I’ll see you at your house. I’m driving you again.”

“Okay then. Hopefully I’ll be in a better mood,” Eddie sighed.

Richie hung up and then walked back to his room. He chose to wear one of his long sleeve black shirts and then a random band t-shirt he found. The phone started ringing in the kitchen.

“Yeah?” 

“One thing I forgot to mention was flannels. I don’t know if girls like them as much but I think they’re fucking hot. Especially when guys roll up the sleeves,” Eddie said on the end of the line.

“God you almost sounded a little desperate there, Eds.” 

Richie might have been a little gay himself cause he knew exactly what Eddie was talking about.

“Alright well that’s all I had to say.”

“Wait. Do you want me to tell you the clothes I think are hot?” Richie smirked.

“Well I’m not gonna wear a thong to school Rich,” Eddie laughed.

“I was thinking more like no clothes but whatever. At least I tried.”

“Bye Richie,” Eddie giggled, before hanging up.

Fucking. Giggled. 

\--------------------------------------------------

Eddie could hear Richie’s car in the driveway. He could still hear his mom snoring so he just left without saying anything. Since it was still dark out and he hadn’t turned the porch light on, he almost tripped on a couple steps.

“Hey Eds? You need any help?”

“Not my name,” Eddie said, putting his backpack in his lap once he sat down.

“Okay so I found this awesome backroad to take to school. Nobody’s ever on it, so we can go as fast as we want!” Richie said, excitedly.

“Emphasis on the ‘we’, Rich,” Eddie sighed.

“Don’t call me ‘Rich’. It makes me sound like an old man.”

“Don’t call me ‘Eds’.”

“How ‘bout if you can call me ‘Rich’, I can call you ‘Eds’?”

“Fuck, fine,” Eddie slumped down in his seat.

“Alright let’s go. Have you ever drifted on a dirt road with a 17 year old driving? Well get ready, Eds,” Richie smirked.

He sped off onto the road and then down a few other roads for a few minutes until the were out near the country.

“Dickhead! This is taking us longer to get to school!”

“Maybe I just wanted to get you alone where no one could find us, so I could murder you. Or worse,” Richie paused, smiling, “make out with you.”

Eddie nearly choked on air while the other boy laughed so hard he swerved the car.

“Wait Rich. This road goes to the kissing bridge. Where Bowers hangs out,” Eddie bit his lip hard.

“Is he a bitch to you, too?” Richie said, demeanor changing completely.

“He hasn’t really done anything to me since 8th grade.”

“Wait. wasn’t he the one who took a picture of your dick in the locker room?” Richie asked.

“Goddamn it, Richie! Did you see it?” 

“No! He got one of me too! Did you see mine?” Richie said, smiling.

“What? No! Why would- oh fuck, that’s Belch’s car!”

Eddie immediately shrunk down into the space below the glove box while the other boy kept driving, calmly.

“Henry’s not even in the car, dude. You’re fine.”

Once the car was out of sight, Eddie crawled back up into his seat.

“So I’m guessing we’re not gonna get to school on time,” Eddie sighed, looking at the vast expanse of road ahead of them.

“Nah, I’m gonna go 80,” Richie smirked, then pressed the pedal to the floor.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Eddie screeched, “You know speed limits are there for a reason and we are on gravel which isn’t a very stable material and- Richie there’s a turn up there! Richie there’s a turn up there! What the actual fuck dude?” 

Richie laughed a little and slowed down.

“I was only going 60.”

The smaller boy started wheezing a little before digging around in his backpack for his inhaler. After having a couple puffs of it, Eddie let out a shaky, whimper like noise, before leaning back and closing his eyes.

“Jesus fucking Christ dude. I almost had a heart attack,” Eddie said.

“Nah. If anything, I just pumped some life into you. Even if it was only 60 miles per hour,” Richie slapped a hand on Eddie’s shoulder.

“If that was your method of being reassuring, it’s gonna need some work.”

“Does that inhaler thing get you out of PE?” Richie asked.

Eddie smiled at how genuine he sounded before shaking his head.

“I wish. They just make me carry it around all the time. There are other ways of getting out of PE though,” Eddie smirked.

“Eddie Kaspbrak! Do you,” Richie gasped, then got quieter, “Skip class?”

“Okay not all the time just for the first 15 minutes so I don’t have to run. I’ll go hide in the bathroom for 15 minutes and then tell coach I was working on school stuff in Mr. Perry’s class. And the best part is, he totally covers for me! So now coach Reed thinks I’m doing extra work and helping him organize books but instead I’m reading in the bathroom.”

“Do you wanna skip school today?” Richie asked.

“Fuck no. Do you know how much trouble I’ll get in with my mom if she found out?” Eddie’s eyes were wider than the sun.

“We just need to get Mr. Perry on board, cause he obviously likes you, and he can call your mom and say that it was just an attendance mix up and you were in his class!”

“How are we gonna tell him without going to school, dickwad? Am I the only person thinking logically here?”

Richie stopped the car then reached down under Eddie’s seat. His face was dangerously close to Eddie’s lap.

“Wo-oah there, Rich. What’re you doing?” Eddie said, shakily. 

Richie popped back up with a giant yellow pages book.

“Everyone in Derry is in this book. So let’s just find him and call him.”

“What if he’s already at school?”

“Then we call the school. This is simple mathematics, Eddie,” Richie might as well have gotten a smirk tattooed on his face.

“This is a terrible idea. If I, hypothetically, got some sort of sickness or broke a bone, my mom would find out I wasn’t at school. Oh here’s another one! If I die you’ll be liable! I just want you to think about-,” Eddie was cut off by Richie flipping the car around and heading the same way they came.

“Where are we going now?” Eddie yelled.

“My house. My mom should still be sleeping now and my dad left for work early. We’ll just go and call Mr. Perry and then leave and go hang out in the woods.”

“What if he says no?” Eddie asked.

“Let’s hope he doesn’t.”

“If he says no, you’re driving me back to school.”

Richie, very recklessly, drove them to his house. Once they got there, he told Eddie to stay in the car while he checked if his mom was awake.

“She’s out like a light. Come on, you have to talk too, you know,” Richie said, opening Eddie’s door for him.

“Where’s the phone?” Eddie asked.

“There’s one out in the garage.”

They, very quietly, snuck through the house to the garage to call their teacher. Richie put the numbers in the phone while Eddie kept watch at the door. After the dial tone played for a while there was a, “Hello?” on the other line.

“Hi! This is Richie, from school.”

“Hey Richie. What’d you need?”

“Well you see here’s the thing. So you know Eddie Kaspbrak?” 

By that time Eddie was pressed up on the other side of the phone.

“Yeah, I know Eddie.”

“Alright so you know that as a result of his overbearing hag of a mother, he has no life and perfect attendance?”

Eddie punched Richie in the chest.

“I’m somewhat aware of that, yes. What does this have to do with me?” the teacher asked, sounding impatient.

“Well I had this plan to skip school with him, give him a little taste of life, but his mom would find out so what I need you to do is make sure it doesn’t show p on his attendance and that his mom doesn’t find out,” Richie blurted out really fast.

“You’re such a fucking idiot,” Eddie mumbled.

“Alright Tozier here’s the deal. I like Eddie. He’s a good kid. You haven’t turned in an assignment in my class all year. So if I say yes, will you use the time to your advantage and finish it? Cause if you don’t, I guess Mrs. Kaspbrak is gonna be one angry lady,” you could almost hear Mr. Perry smirking on the phone.

Richie held the bottom of the phone so the teacher wouldn’t hear him.

“You owe me fucking big time for this one Eds.”

“What? It’s not my fault I do schoolwork you dick.”

“Alright. What was the most recent assignment?” Richie put the phone back up to his ear.

“I’m afraid my time has run out my friend. I’m already late. Ask Eddie about it.”

“So is that a yes?” Richie asked.

“Yeah sure.”

“Thank you so much you are the coolest tea-” 

Mr. Perry hung up halfway through Richie’s excited rant.

“Off to the woods we go.”

“I think I’m gonna puke,” Eddie said, near hyperventilating.

“Would you just relax?”

“No Richie! I will not ‘just relax’. If my mom finds out, I’m going to be locked in the house for weeks!”

“It’s just one day. Calm the fuck down,” Richie said.

They went out the back door of the garage and got in the car. They drove out past the kissing bridge where they were earlier that day. Richie pulled over to the side of the road and turned off the car.

“Are we seriously going to hang out in the Barrens? What are we? 12?” Eddie rolled his eyes.

“I think you’re just scared.”

Eddie unbuckled his seatbelt and jumped out of the car.

“I am not. If I were, would I be walking down the hill right now?” Eddie said, while walking down the steep hill off the road.

After a few steps he got caught on a vine of ivy. He started falling face first down the hill. Richie ran over to help.

“Jesus. For being so small you fall pretty hard,” Richie laughed.

Eddie was still stuck in the vine so he didn’t fall very far.

“I can get up myself!” Eddie grunted, swatting Richie’s hand away.

Richie went back to the car and grabbed both of their backpacks.

“Just let me walk in front of you on the way down?” 

Eddie nodded and started following the other boy down the hill. It was that moment he realized, he fucked up big time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so...now that I'm in quarantine and all I have more time. does that mean upload schedule...? maybe. no promises tho....


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